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1 night 2 disappointing movies
The Unborn: OMG SO FREAKING BAD. But not like, Razzie bad. Just... formulaic in all the wrong ways, and not formulaic, also in all the wrong ways. They broke out Nazis, demon dogs and murderous children and still this movie sucked. That's just not right. I could tell from the start that this movie was going to suck, when the lead was being haunted before they'd even finished with their establishing shot. Horror movie in a hurry? Never a good sign.
Then there was the sassy black best friend, the disappearing daddy (two scenes and he went on a mystery vacation?), and the kid that would not die (not even being hit by a car was enough to stop him), and yet was too fucking lazy to WALK ACROSS THE STREET AND HAUNT A BITCH PROPERLY. Come on!
But the nadir of this movie had to be when the demon's origin was revealed to be in Auschwitz, when one of those predictably wacky Nazi doctors tortured a kid. To death. Big surprise. Kid comes back to life, and they LET THE KID BACK IN WITH THE OTHERS. Dead kid's twin sister, all of ten years old, decides to take it upon herself to put her demon-brother down. What did the filmmakers do? They SKIPPED THE FIGHT. Tiny fraternal twins in a fight to the death, and they skipped the fight. Now I ask you, what kind of horror director skips over something so glorious? It's a travesty.
Stop Loss: OMG SO RIDICULOUS. The propaganda was so over powering that I had to stop watching. Would it kill them to mask the message in maybe the tiniest bit of subtle characterization, and logical plot development? I mean really.
War is bad!
Yeah I get it.
No, war is bad!
Yeah dude, I totally get it.
But war? Bad!
War bad, me bored.
War is bad?
*rageflail*
Thankfully, there's nothing at all disappointing about The Remnants, a pilot produced during the WGA strike, for a hijinks-filled, post-zombiepocalypse tv show. Lolarious. It needs to be an ongoing.
Oh, and something happy-making: CBC has posted a list of it's favourite Motown recordings, in honor of Motown turning 50. The article links to videos for all of them.
Then there was the sassy black best friend, the disappearing daddy (two scenes and he went on a mystery vacation?), and the kid that would not die (not even being hit by a car was enough to stop him), and yet was too fucking lazy to WALK ACROSS THE STREET AND HAUNT A BITCH PROPERLY. Come on!
But the nadir of this movie had to be when the demon's origin was revealed to be in Auschwitz, when one of those predictably wacky Nazi doctors tortured a kid. To death. Big surprise. Kid comes back to life, and they LET THE KID BACK IN WITH THE OTHERS. Dead kid's twin sister, all of ten years old, decides to take it upon herself to put her demon-brother down. What did the filmmakers do? They SKIPPED THE FIGHT. Tiny fraternal twins in a fight to the death, and they skipped the fight. Now I ask you, what kind of horror director skips over something so glorious? It's a travesty.
Stop Loss: OMG SO RIDICULOUS. The propaganda was so over powering that I had to stop watching. Would it kill them to mask the message in maybe the tiniest bit of subtle characterization, and logical plot development? I mean really.
War is bad!
Yeah I get it.
No, war is bad!
Yeah dude, I totally get it.
But war? Bad!
War bad, me bored.
War is bad?
*rageflail*
Thankfully, there's nothing at all disappointing about The Remnants, a pilot produced during the WGA strike, for a hijinks-filled, post-zombiepocalypse tv show. Lolarious. It needs to be an ongoing.
Oh, and something happy-making: CBC has posted a list of it's favourite Motown recordings, in honor of Motown turning 50. The article links to videos for all of them.