I don't follow She-Hulk, but I read the issues (all three of them...) in which Tony is sleeping with Jan very recently.
He used his secret identity to manipulate Jan into having a sexual relationship with him, that she otherwise would never have considered.
I don't think he specifically used his secret identity to manipulate her into a relationship. She was genuinely interested in him as Tony and he encouraged that interest. It was still wrong wrong wrong, because he knew she wouldn't choose to be with him if she knew he was Iron Man, but I don't think he manipulated her interest. That implies a maliciousness that I don't think he felt.
He didn't even see how he was wrong, until after he'd lied to her.
He does think about telling her several times very early on in his pursuit of her, but he always talks himself out of it. Now granted, this is a matter of interpretation, but I read that as an indication of how desperately he wanted a relationship with someone he truly liked and trusted.
Like you said, he was being very selfish--putting his own desires over her emotional health--but I think he knew it was wrong. Especially given the conversation he had with Steve about the relationship. He was incredibly defensive there.
I also read it as being indicative of there being something really wrong in Tony's head, and for the record, even before her finding out, it's already got him thinking about drinking.
Oh yes. I never realized before just how close in time Hank's breakdown, the divorce, Jan's relationship with Tony, and Tony's breakdown were in time. Tony falls off the wagon two, maybe three issues after he reveals his identity to Jan and she leaves him. Given the timing, I have to think that his relationship with Jan was a last, desperate grab for support and stability, and it completely backfired, because when she rejected him he not only lost the romantic relationship, he lost the regard of a friend and teammate.
None of which makes what he did okay, of course. But I must admit, after actually reading those issues, I've been surprised that no one seems to realize that Tony was also in a very emotionally fucked up period during that relationship. I think this is the first post or discussion I've seen that acknowledges that.
Regarding what he did to Jen, I don't know the details so I won't say much, but isn't Jen married? That makes it even more wildly OOC a thing for Tony to do. He's never slept with a married woman. Okay, so I haven't read every single issue of his canon yet, but sevearl issues have made a point of saying he's never slept with a married woman.
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He used his secret identity to manipulate Jan into having a sexual relationship with him, that she otherwise would never have considered.
I don't think he specifically used his secret identity to manipulate her into a relationship. She was genuinely interested in him as Tony and he encouraged that interest. It was still wrong wrong wrong, because he knew she wouldn't choose to be with him if she knew he was Iron Man, but I don't think he manipulated her interest. That implies a maliciousness that I don't think he felt.
He didn't even see how he was wrong, until after he'd lied to her.
He does think about telling her several times very early on in his pursuit of her, but he always talks himself out of it. Now granted, this is a matter of interpretation, but I read that as an indication of how desperately he wanted a relationship with someone he truly liked and trusted.
Like you said, he was being very selfish--putting his own desires over her emotional health--but I think he knew it was wrong. Especially given the conversation he had with Steve about the relationship. He was incredibly defensive there.
I also read it as being indicative of there being something really wrong in Tony's head, and for the record, even before her finding out, it's already got him thinking about drinking.
Oh yes. I never realized before just how close in time Hank's breakdown, the divorce, Jan's relationship with Tony, and Tony's breakdown were in time. Tony falls off the wagon two, maybe three issues after he reveals his identity to Jan and she leaves him. Given the timing, I have to think that his relationship with Jan was a last, desperate grab for support and stability, and it completely backfired, because when she rejected him he not only lost the romantic relationship, he lost the regard of a friend and teammate.
None of which makes what he did okay, of course. But I must admit, after actually reading those issues, I've been surprised that no one seems to realize that Tony was also in a very emotionally fucked up period during that relationship. I think this is the first post or discussion I've seen that acknowledges that.
Regarding what he did to Jen, I don't know the details so I won't say much, but isn't Jen married? That makes it even more wildly OOC a thing for Tony to do. He's never slept with a married woman. Okay, so I haven't read every single issue of his canon yet, but sevearl issues have made a point of saying he's never slept with a married woman.