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Entry tags:
this pony is alternative
One Day In The Park
"Dastardly?"
"I like dastardly. It's got character."
"This ain't no gossip rag. You're on city, Mike. City don't need character."
"Right, because potholes are so interesting."
Johnny made clearing on Mike's desk by pushing stacks of notes and yet-to-be-filed paperwork towards the center of the wreck, and sat down. He leaned in. The menace was probably all in Mike's head.
"Mike, this is New York City. We got the Avengers, the Fantastic Four, and sometimes the X-Men. Superheroes are so ordinary here, you get to cover them in city. The assholes you went to j school with are trailing zoning commissioners for hot leads. Take a second to appreciate your luck."
"Yeah." Mike nodded. "You're right, Johnny."
"Always am." Johnny put his mug down on a stack of notes. Mike winced and thought about pointing out the fast-developing coffee ring, but Johnny just leaned in closer and kept on going. "Don't talk down to your readers. This ain't The Bugle. We don't tell them what to think."
"Dastardly is talking down?"
"Dastardly is talking down, by way of showing off your fancy education. Everyone knows what it means, and if they don't? They can figure it out fine from context. Doesn't change the fact that you sound like an asshole who's read too many dimestore novels and old comics." Johnny rapped his knuckles against the screen of Mike's laptop. Mike suppressed a wince. "Toss this shit out and start over."
"Yeah, ok," Mike said. While Johnny got up and headed back to the former closet that was his office, Mike hit delete, and settled in to stare at his now blank screen. He had a deadline to meet.
"Hey kid!" Johnny hollared. "Find the core of the story. Find the hook." He brandished his coffee mug in a possibly encouraging, even more possibly threatening manner, and retreated into his closet.
"The hook." Mike stared at his laptop. The cursor blinked. Blinked. Blinked. It was taunting him.
Captain America and Iron Man stopped a would be supervillain, and made some kids happy. Another day in New York. What was the hook in that?
Mike clicked opened his inspiration, a folder of pictures of the Central Park Zoo kerfluffle (some submitted online by readers, some through the wire, and some by Johnny's girlfriend Shonda). There were the standard shots: the Ringmaster threatening kids with his whip; Captain America's shield knocking him off his makeshift soapbox (actually a fire hydrant); Iron Man swooping in to rescue the kids. The last photo was one of the ponies, holding the Ringmaster down with its hooves, while the Avengers secured the scene. Hero pony?
Mike picked up his phone and started making some calls.
***
Tony Stark Becomes A Proud Parent (Women Swoon)
"Are you making fun of PETA?" Mike shrugged. "You are making fun of PETA," she said.
"What? No I'm--" Shonda arched one of her perfectly shaped eyebrows. "Maybe a little?"
"Are you trying to provoke a letter campaign? I mean, 'unfit parent'?" Mike tried to look innocent. "That's a gross mischaracterization of their press release - at minimum."
"Hey, hey, which one of us is the writer here," he said, pointing to his own chest. "And which one is the photographer?" Miked pointed to her. "Why don't you go take some pictures missy, and leave the activist-baiting to the pros?"
Shonda laughed. "You say that now, but when PETA is mauling your inbox, and Johnny starts talking about budget cuts, you'll be singing a different tune."
"You might be right."
"Of course I'm right-
"You're always right. Just like your boyfriend."
"It's the entire foundation of our relationship. But enough about us."
"City don't need colour," Mike said. "I know."
"Our very own Howard Hughes has adopted a superintelligent, talking pony," Shonda said. "And you're busy playing vegan chicken with PETA? There are much more interesting issues at hand."
"Such as?"
"Such as the legal battle he's in for, adopting a pony and calling him a person. And what's he going to do with him? Is the super-intelligent pony going to go to school?"
"Stark's probably already got him on the waiting lists, and is in the process of buying a wing at all the most prestigious private schools."
"Sounds like an angle to me." Shonda grinned.
"Yeah, sounds like."
Once again, Mike had calls to make.
Different version of And Pony Makes Three? This is my brain in its natural state, btw.
The tranquility of Central Park's beloved petting zoo was disturbed today, by a new masked menace, calling himself The Ringmaster. The whip-wielding baddy descended on the park mid-morning, with the intention of turning the normally friendly ponies, goats, ducks and sheep, to his own dastardly purposes. The three classes of school children visiting the zoo, were grateful for the swift intervention by the Avengers. Captain America and Iron Man--
"Dastardly?"
"I like dastardly. It's got character."
"This ain't no gossip rag. You're on city, Mike. City don't need character."
"Right, because potholes are so interesting."
Johnny made clearing on Mike's desk by pushing stacks of notes and yet-to-be-filed paperwork towards the center of the wreck, and sat down. He leaned in. The menace was probably all in Mike's head.
"Mike, this is New York City. We got the Avengers, the Fantastic Four, and sometimes the X-Men. Superheroes are so ordinary here, you get to cover them in city. The assholes you went to j school with are trailing zoning commissioners for hot leads. Take a second to appreciate your luck."
"Yeah." Mike nodded. "You're right, Johnny."
"Always am." Johnny put his mug down on a stack of notes. Mike winced and thought about pointing out the fast-developing coffee ring, but Johnny just leaned in closer and kept on going. "Don't talk down to your readers. This ain't The Bugle. We don't tell them what to think."
"Dastardly is talking down?"
"Dastardly is talking down, by way of showing off your fancy education. Everyone knows what it means, and if they don't? They can figure it out fine from context. Doesn't change the fact that you sound like an asshole who's read too many dimestore novels and old comics." Johnny rapped his knuckles against the screen of Mike's laptop. Mike suppressed a wince. "Toss this shit out and start over."
"Yeah, ok," Mike said. While Johnny got up and headed back to the former closet that was his office, Mike hit delete, and settled in to stare at his now blank screen. He had a deadline to meet.
"Hey kid!" Johnny hollared. "Find the core of the story. Find the hook." He brandished his coffee mug in a possibly encouraging, even more possibly threatening manner, and retreated into his closet.
"The hook." Mike stared at his laptop. The cursor blinked. Blinked. Blinked. It was taunting him.
Captain America and Iron Man stopped a would be supervillain, and made some kids happy. Another day in New York. What was the hook in that?
Mike clicked opened his inspiration, a folder of pictures of the Central Park Zoo kerfluffle (some submitted online by readers, some through the wire, and some by Johnny's girlfriend Shonda). There were the standard shots: the Ringmaster threatening kids with his whip; Captain America's shield knocking him off his makeshift soapbox (actually a fire hydrant); Iron Man swooping in to rescue the kids. The last photo was one of the ponies, holding the Ringmaster down with its hooves, while the Avengers secured the scene. Hero pony?
Mike picked up his phone and started making some calls.
***
Tony Stark Becomes A Proud Parent (Women Swoon)
Tony Stark is racing to childproof his penthouse this week, but not for a human child. The playboy billionaire has adopted Brin, the heroic young pony who helped Captain America and Iron Man bring the Ringmaster to justice. Stark's executive assistant reports that Brin will have comfortable, state of the art lodgings. No word yet on if he'll be bunking with Stark's fleet of sports cars. People For the Ethical Treatment of Animals released a statement decrying the adoption, saying that Stark's previously [terriblebadnogood-word Mike???] stance on animal rights, and his playboy lifestyle, make him an unfit parent--
"Are you making fun of PETA?" Mike shrugged. "You are making fun of PETA," she said.
"What? No I'm--" Shonda arched one of her perfectly shaped eyebrows. "Maybe a little?"
"Are you trying to provoke a letter campaign? I mean, 'unfit parent'?" Mike tried to look innocent. "That's a gross mischaracterization of their press release - at minimum."
"Hey, hey, which one of us is the writer here," he said, pointing to his own chest. "And which one is the photographer?" Miked pointed to her. "Why don't you go take some pictures missy, and leave the activist-baiting to the pros?"
Shonda laughed. "You say that now, but when PETA is mauling your inbox, and Johnny starts talking about budget cuts, you'll be singing a different tune."
"You might be right."
"Of course I'm right-
"You're always right. Just like your boyfriend."
"It's the entire foundation of our relationship. But enough about us."
"City don't need colour," Mike said. "I know."
"Our very own Howard Hughes has adopted a superintelligent, talking pony," Shonda said. "And you're busy playing vegan chicken with PETA? There are much more interesting issues at hand."
"Such as?"
"Such as the legal battle he's in for, adopting a pony and calling him a person. And what's he going to do with him? Is the super-intelligent pony going to go to school?"
"Stark's probably already got him on the waiting lists, and is in the process of buying a wing at all the most prestigious private schools."
"Sounds like an angle to me." Shonda grinned.
"Yeah, sounds like."
Once again, Mike had calls to make.
Different version of And Pony Makes Three? This is my brain in its natural state, btw.