Writer's Block: Tricky Questions
Jan. 13th, 2009 04:04 pm[Error: unknown template qotd]
I think most of us in the West share a bone-deep, conditioned response to those words. We all know what those words mean, or at least what they too often mean. "Things've gone FUBAR and now comes time for placing blame." This is true for personal or professional relationships. Your boss needs to talk to you? Something's gone pear-shaped. Your SO needs to talk to you? S/he's met someone else, or s/he wants space, or hey, maybe s/he found your collection of futanari hentai. You start collecting clues, assessing body language, tone of voice, and locale. Part of your consciousness goes on a search and destroy mission through your memory, trying to connect this with something, anything you or s/he might be guilty of.
The thing is, my actual lived experience has been a stark contrast to what the stories tell you is going to happen. My most recent "we need to talk" resulted in my being chastened by a superior at work, sure, but I pretty quickly turned that situation to my advantage. We ended up having a really good talk, about our goals, personal and professional. Even the personal WNTT bomb, is it really so bad? I've "needed to talk" with someone, without it having any Desperate Housewives riding sassy on the drama lama sort of implications. If I'm smart about it, I let the fight or flight work itself out, while also recognizing that while poisonous as the phrase has become, it's no indication that life is at imminent risk of immitating art. There won't be a short, but intense confrontation, followed by a commercial break. GEICO! CORNPOPS! ING!
And truth be told, I'd be pissed if a SO pulled the WNTT card. Seriously dude, that's the best you can do? There's nothing worse than a formulaic dumping. *g*
I think most of us in the West share a bone-deep, conditioned response to those words. We all know what those words mean, or at least what they too often mean. "Things've gone FUBAR and now comes time for placing blame." This is true for personal or professional relationships. Your boss needs to talk to you? Something's gone pear-shaped. Your SO needs to talk to you? S/he's met someone else, or s/he wants space, or hey, maybe s/he found your collection of futanari hentai. You start collecting clues, assessing body language, tone of voice, and locale. Part of your consciousness goes on a search and destroy mission through your memory, trying to connect this with something, anything you or s/he might be guilty of.
The thing is, my actual lived experience has been a stark contrast to what the stories tell you is going to happen. My most recent "we need to talk" resulted in my being chastened by a superior at work, sure, but I pretty quickly turned that situation to my advantage. We ended up having a really good talk, about our goals, personal and professional. Even the personal WNTT bomb, is it really so bad? I've "needed to talk" with someone, without it having any Desperate Housewives riding sassy on the drama lama sort of implications. If I'm smart about it, I let the fight or flight work itself out, while also recognizing that while poisonous as the phrase has become, it's no indication that life is at imminent risk of immitating art. There won't be a short, but intense confrontation, followed by a commercial break. GEICO! CORNPOPS! ING!
And truth be told, I'd be pissed if a SO pulled the WNTT card. Seriously dude, that's the best you can do? There's nothing worse than a formulaic dumping. *g*